Surreal Moment

I'm not big into celebrities. Not that I don't appreciate them, for it can't be easy having the world have an opinion on how you live your life and making free with the comments. I am just not awestruck by them.

Okay, I'll admit that when I was in Hollywood last month and I saw Bo Bice, the runner-up from American Idol Season 4, waiting in the wings to be interviewed, my panties got a little wet. But that wasn't so much because he was a celebrity, it was his hair! That gorgeous hair. And his smile. His smile cannot be discounted. But it wasn't an "Oh my God, it's someone famous!" kind of moment. It was more of an "Oh my God, if he wasn't married or surrounded by bodyguards, I would so jump him," kind of moment.

I'm saying this because tonight, Rod Stewart began following me on Twitter. Yeah, that Rod Stewart. At least, I think it's that Rod Stewart. From all accounts and impressions, it most certainly seems like it is. I sent him a Direct Message saying hi and thanks for following. He can't send a message back, because I haven't friended him.

And I'm sitting here wondering why I haven't. I mean, come on! This is my chance to rub shoulders with someone famous! I'm an aspiring writer and playwright. I should want to network and get my name out there, right? What better way than through a celebrity? One that began following me, instead of the other way around.

And I'm thinking, is it because I like the idea that I've attracted a celebrity and perhaps I can make myself seem more alluring by holding off jumping on the bandwagon of Rod Stewart followers? Is it the pull of being able to think, perhaps he likes me more than I like him?

All of this sounds very egotistical. And perhaps I like that too. For a brief moment in time, I have someone famous liking me enough to follow me.

It certainly is a surreal moment. I couldn't stop giggling, truth be told, at the absurdity of it all. I mean, this is Rod Stewart! Rod the Bod! Rod, Do-You-Think-I'm-Sexy, Fuck-Yes-I-Do Stewart!

And I can't be bothered. I think I'll wait to see if he says hello. Or if he says something interesting on his wall. I mean, after all, beyond his persona, what the hell do I know? Is he someone I'd like to hang out with? I've no idea.

But still, it is a surreal moment.

Exes

So, I've been thinking a lot about relationships lately, and exes, specifically.

I know many, many people, both men and women, who say that when a relationship has ended, they've maintained a speaking relationship with their ex. They are friends or friendly or occasionally have lunch or dinner with each other.

And I wonder how the hell they can do that.

Because I cannot. Not on any level. If a relationship is over, it is over. Completely. I can't imagine staying friends with someone with whom I'm no longer involved.

Once a relationship has moved beyond friendship and onto lover/roommate/fiance status, I cannot see myself taking such a huge step backwards to just friendship again. For instance, I can't see myself sitting across from Andrew at a restaurant, asking after his friends and family, and not imagining either a) that sexual romp in the middle of the baseball field or b) the huge fight where we ended up chucking glasses of Kool-Aid at each other.

Do you follow? It would be like pretending that all that came before it somehow either didn't matter or isn't important enough to be remembered. I suppose one could say, Dari, get over it, get past it, move beyond it. To which I say, NO.

I don't want to stay friends with someone who I've given head to a thousand times but who could cheat on me with some slut he met at work. I don't want to have a drink with someone who, the last time I had a drink with, we had four hours of sex and I was sore and walked funny for two days, only to discover he had lied to me about major events in his life.

Call me silly, but I'm like that!

Because for whatever reason we had for breaking up, they were big enough for me to walk away from them. And trust me, it takes a lot for me to walk away. I'm not like that. Through thick and thin, good times and bad, I'm there. But if you've hurt me enough for me to walk away, then you aren't a good enough person to be my friend.

Is it wrong to think that way?

We've all had friends and boyfriends/girlfriends come in and out of our lives. I believe everything happens for a reason, and the reason why you became friends with that dude you worked with suddenly isn't there when you are no longer working together. Some friends and lovers are transient, and I'm okay with that. If I had to deal with every friend and lover I've ever had, I'd have no time to pee. It's just that simple.

But that's not what I'm talking about here. I'm talking about someone who has made me laugh until I couldn't breath, and cry until I fell asleep, only to wake and cry some more. The person with whom I've attended family reunions and weddings and funerals. That I cried with when I found out I wasn't pregnant. How does one wipe away all of those intense encounters that indelibly left a mark on me to just become friends once more?

I can't do it.

My First Time

I don't blog. Well, I never thought I would blog, might be more accurate. I always maintained that you had to feel pretty self-important to post something and expect people are going to read it. But I've learned that the world is a funny place, and people do weird stuff all the time, including read strangers' blogs!

I do maintain accounts at other sites. I've a page (wall?) on Facebook. I think I created it to do something else, but I've forgotten now what it was, and I'm taken by surprise when someone friends me on Facebook. I keep forgetting it. I've an account on Live Journal. I've made fantastic friends, discovered quite a bit about myself, and have a tremendous amount of fun there. It's not open to the public, however.

This is, apparently. So, here it is, my first blog.

Do I have anything important to say? Not really! But it is still early, and I've not gotten out of bed properly, yet. Going pee and getting coffee doesn't count. Getting out of bed is more of a state of mind than physical action, in my opinion.

I don't talk much about myself. I never have, and I can't see myself starting now. I can be funny. I can be sarcastic. I am even a bit intimidating at times. I'll offer opinions, make observations and sometimes tell jokes.

I've an account on Twitter. Don't we all? You can find me here http://twitter.com/Daria67 . Just so you are aware, I won't follow just because you follow me. I will check out your wall, read what you have to say. If I think you are funny/interesting/sarcastic/insert other adjective here/ and I think we'd get along, I'll friend you. If not, don't feel bad, please. If I Tweet and you like it, comment on it! I read them, and I usually respond, as well. Do it enough, and well, we'll see what happens.

Kinda like real life, isn't it? You don't make friends right away. You scope the other person out, run into them from time to time. Make small talk. See if they've the qualities you're looking for in someone to hang out with. Of course, it's great if you come recommended. A friend of a friend, and all that. I've met some great friends like that.

So, there you have it. A brief intro by me and a link to Twitter - all because I am shameless and want more followers.

I hope like hell you comment and I can read them. I've yet to figure out how to leave a comment. I try and try, it's like they don't want me to speak. Hmph.